Health & Fitness

Sex & the Menopause

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with Anna Richards - Sex Expert and Founder of ethical sex platform

It is a myth that your sex life is over because you are going through menopause. It is entirely false to think you can’t have a satisfying sex life or be able to enjoy the pleasures of orgasms. Our brains are our biggest sexual organ. However, we need to be aware of our bodies’ role. Satisfying sex through and post-menopause depends on desire, arousal, absence of pain and the ability to reach orgasm. Nature didn’t intend for women to be sexually active after menopause, so we need to work at it, address the issues and be creative. Explore the emotional, physical and medical factors that sabotage sexual response.

There is no shame in a little lubrication assistance. It is typical for women during and after menopause to experience vaginal dryness. As our ovaries radically reduce the production of Oestrogen, our vaginal lining thins, known as Vaginal Atrophy, and our vaginal walls become less elastic, leading to a burning sensation during penetration. For mild symptoms, a good water-based lubricant or the longer lasting silicone based lubes can make penetration much more pleasurable. Topical Oestrogen, by prescription, either as a cream or suppository, can help plump up the vaginal tissues and aid lubrication. In addition, regular vaginal sexual activity increases blood flow keeping our vaginal muscles toned, and our pelvic floor muscles strengthened that support the bladder, improving bladder function and reducing incontinence and leakage.


Increase desire
After menopause, libido declines, making it harder to be aroused. Look at how you can trigger desire and arousal through mental stimulation. Explore different fantasies and erotic material to better understand what your turn-ons are. Add to your sexual adventures by exploring ethical porn sites like FrolicMe, reading erotica, watching erotic films or listening to audio erotica, which can allow you to interact in a more personal, intimate and fantasy-filled way. Allow your mind to go wherever it wants during masturbation and explore being more in the moment. You can then reflect on how you can bring these fantasies into partnered sex.

Keeping your partner aware of the changes you are experiencing and the conversations around pleasure, you can learn to share other forms of intimacy which aren’t always focused on penetration. Bring more foreplay into your sexual activities. Sensual touching, and erotic massages, learn how your body responds and how and where you enjoy stimulation. Through understanding, you can communicate and feel far more comfortable and confident to enjoy great sex through menopause and beyond.

Post-menopause sex – don’t expect it to be the same as in your 20s, but it doesn’t mean it can’t be fulfilling. Some women post-menopause experience quicker orgasms, so edging (halting stimulation when on the brink of orgasm) becomes more intense. By doing this repeatedly, the pleasure sensations build, making the final glorious climax a stronger and more satisfying experience. Commit to masturbating regularly, only allowing an orgasm occasionally. The idea is
to build up your sexual desire and arousal. As your sexual desire increases, your mind will probably think sexy thoughts, stimulating an interest in sexual fantasies.

Toys & sex aids
During post-menopause, blood flows slower to your genitals, meaning it can take longer to be aroused. As a result, more focused stimulation is needed to reach the heavenly O. Experiment with different types of stimulation and sexual aids. The vast breadth of toys available offers a world of self-pleasure and sexual exploration. Focusing more on clitoral stimulation, as the clitoris’ only function is to offer pleasure though a vast amount of nerve endings is more likely to result in a satisfying climax without the need for painful penetration.

To learn more about Anna visit Frolicme

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